Thursday, May 31, 2012

Casey got a job!

A new job, that is.

As you might know, Casey (my curly-headed and very smart husband) is working toward getting his CPA license. And he just landed a job at a CPA firm here in Denver! It sounds like the perfect fit for him, and I am so excited that he gets to do something he loves and is passionate about. He starts in approximately two weeks. Which means we have some shopping to do (button up shirts and the like). Enter Gina, his personal shopping assistant!

So, not much else to say. Just wanted to catch you up. If you are his friend on Facebook or have his cell number, send him a message to congratulate him!

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Forgiving the Un-Sorry

How do you forgive the un-sorry? Many people have said something to the effect of: "Holding onto unforgiveness does nothing to punish the other person; It only punishes you." But what if someone has done something and they haven't asked for your forgiveness? How do you manage to let go of something like that?

Many times I have, and I am sure you have as well, been on the receiving end of someone's toxicity. The most toxic relationship in my life was with my late stepfather when I was a teenager. We had a kind of cold war going on between us despite numerous attempts of other people to "fix" us. The last two years I lived in the house with him, we didn't speak at all. I hated him more than anything. I would tell people, "I only have one enemy in this world, and it is my stepdad." I moved out at 18 and held onto all that for a few years, until I met the Lord. I realized that if I kept these feelings inside, they would eat me alive. Because God forgave me for all the things I'd done, how could I hold onto the unforgiveness toward my stepdad? I made a command decision: I would forgive him. He hadn't apologized for his hurtful and insensitive behavior, but I wasn't about to wait for that. I immediately felt a huge weight lift off my heart and shoulders. Please hear this: This forgiveness didn't mean I began thinking what he did was "ok." I just stopped holding him hostage in my heart and asked God to move his love through my heart toward him, and change my view of the situation.

A few years later, my brothers and I all received a letter from him, apologizing for all the things that happened while we were living in the house. He had been on the receiving end of major toxicity as a child, it turns out-- administered to him with a 4 x 4 by his own father. He had been abused physically for years and just then realized how it had affected him and all his relationships. I was grateful for the letter, albeit shocked he'd written it. It was a sweet end to the cold war that I'd given up a few years before. He died a few years later, from a sudden stroke. I am forever grateful to God for giving me the ability to make amends with him. I will see him in Heaven and look forward to a re-made friendship with him.

Today I was in a dance store getting new shoes, and began looking at leotards just for kicks. All of sudden, God jogged my memory to an image he gifted to me years ago. "God works in mysterious ways," people sometimes say, and at this particular moment, I have to agree. Sometimes a certain image, song, or color will bring to mind a promise God made to me long ago. Today it was a color on a beautifully designed leotard that helped me remember-- a lovely, pale lilac color:

God is dancing with me on a sunny, breezy day. We are in a lush green field dotted with wild flowers, and the sun gently shines down on us. We twirl, turn, and He lifts me high in the air with the easiest of smiles. I wear a beautiful, pale lilac flowing sundress. My heart overflows with joy and completeness.

The image of this lilac dress in particular has stuck with me for more than ten years. This gift, this image that God planted in my heart, represents freedom and a feeling of total beloved-ness in His arms and presence. Nothing else matters when I am dancing with my Daddy. I am precious, beautiful, and completely loved as I am. He believes the best of me, even though both of us know I have hurt Him in the past and will continue to. I am 100% complete in His strong embrace.

Despite the painful memories associated with it, I want to remember my experience with my stepdad. I want to remember that God is still working behind the scenes to heal people. I want to remember my lilac dress, the feeling of completeness, and most of all the knowledge that God provides all the forgiveness I could ever need.

Do you hold an image or picture in your heart that you can return to when you are struggling?

Monday, May 28, 2012

What Battles Have You Seen?

Today is Memorial Day... I'm thinking about those who have gone through battle, fought for our freedoms, and paid the ultimate price. I am so grateful for those (including many of my relatives) who have fought in the armed forces.

I'm also thinking of spiritual battle today. So much going on under the surface, unseen to the eye. These are the battles that have been the hardest for me to deal with, especially when I refuse to let God help me (but that's my bad).

Casey and I at my cousin's wedding a few years ago

Today I'm going to take some time to sit and journal, and think about the spiritual battles I've been through. God has seen me through so much in my short time here on Earth. I'd like to give credit where credit is due. Also deserving of much credit is my husband Casey, who has seen me through many battles in the last five years (including major health issues, countless emotional battles, and a major career change).

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Don't Quit Your Day Job

If you want to know what I do almost everyday in/for my day job, watch this video:

Most professional dancers who work for a ballet company are required to do a daily ballet class in order to maintain strength and work on technique. This is a glimpse into the daily life of the Royal Ballet (one of the best ballet companies anywhere), and their dancers are talented far above what I could ever dream to be... However, I share this link because many of the dance combinations, and the general layout of the class is extremely similar to what I experience in my work. This is a unique YouTube video because it features not just clips of a class, but their entire 1 hour, 15 minute class. If you make it through the whole thing, let me know and I'll buy you coffee. I say this because I don't know many people who will actually sit through the whole thing besides me and a couple other people.

Their talent is truly humbling and it was a huge treat today to sit down today and watch them work their way through an entire class, and to pick up on some of their good habits and technique. (I'd embed the video into the post, but it would take six months for it to download, so you get to watch it on YouTube.)

Friday, May 25, 2012

Pure Joy

This picture (David Hallberg) paints a portrait of pure joy in movement. I got to take a ballet class again today, and although I felt physically tired, my heart was singing. The jumping section of class in particular gave me such joy. Jumps are one of those things I have the ability to do well when my muscles are cooperating, and today despite my slight tiredness, I felt springy and light (for most of the petite allegro, or "little jumps" combination that is). There were times I felt as if I was jumping on a trampoline. In the big jump section of class, I had a couple moments where I could swear I was flying.

David Hallberg in rehearsal (photo by Gene Schiavone)

I feel free and joyful today! The feeling of unadulturated freedom is, in my opinion, what life is all about. The joy of being who you were meant to be, living the life you were given and letting go of everything else that drags you down. I am feeling closer to my own heart and God's heart than I have in literally months. 

What makes you feel free and joyful?

(PS If you need a little joy booster today... Watch this video:

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Poll: Beautiful or disturbing?

Svetlana Zakharova in rehearsal (photo by Marc Haegemen)

Bunhead post #2 coming at you: Svetlana Zakharova in rehearsal.

Poll: What is your initial impression of this image? Beautiful or disturbing? Should be interesting to hear from dancers and non dancers alike. Cast your vote below (click on text "comments" in blue).

Just Jump

the freedom that comes from that leap
down the canyon, into the water
terrifying, freeing, huge
just jump

it's almost as if you were always meant to do it
letting go of everything
all that extra crap, that pulled you down
just jump

shedding the backpacks, the water bottles
the extra jackets and vests
equipment meant for past lives
just jump

leave behind even the snacks and meals
previously thought to be important
the water holds all you need
just jump

the journey to the edge is long
takes mental courage and clarity
concentration and time
but then-- you can just jump

Wednesday, May 23, 2012


"Hello, my name is Gina and I'm a bunhead."
"Hi, Gina..."

Addictions... There are good ones and bad ones. At the moment I am addicted to looking at videos and pictures of well known professional dancers. When this happens to an individual, the person is typically called a "bunhead." This is due to the fact ballet dancers wear their hair in buns.

photo by Gene Schiavone

The photo above is of a beautiful principal dancer in Raymonda (don't quote me on that, the website I found it on didn't specify-- but the headpiece makes me believe it's either Raymonda or La Bayadere). My purpose in posting this, however, is that it captures a moment of intense concentration to technique, and yet total commitment to character.  Not to mention the amazing arch on her standing foot.

In the last month I've been finding quite a lot of inspiration from watching dancers do their thing, and very well at that. Some names that come to mind are Svetlana Zakharova (Bolshoi Ballet and Teatro Alla Scala Principal Dancer), Marianela Nunez (Royal Ballet Principal), Darcey Bussell (former Royal Ballet Principal), and Roberto Bolle (Principal with American Ballet Theatre). These people were literally born to dance. Every movement of their bodies makes it clear that their muscles were made to create ballet positions and steps with grace and power.

Seeing the amazing talent of the above dancers inspires me to reach higher, to attain a level of technique and artistry I would not even know existed if I hadn't seen their videos or photos. And for this I am grateful.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The Boxer

In high school I listened to Simon and Garfunkle. A lot. The above song is one of my all time favorites, and inspiring. I want to fight for the good things in this life, I want to fight for the things that really matter and that have a worthy cause. I want to cast aside the useless things and arguments that inevitably will come. And when I am tired and feeling misunderstood, I will feel like leaving-- but I don't want to do that: "...I am leaving, I am leaving, but the fighter still remains..."


in a stream, I see water
I see rocks
the movement and rushing, calm yet furious
distinctively deceptive

a relaxing image?
and yet, the rocks stand
the constant movement of the water over their bodies
you cannot hear the transformation as they stand under the rush

the changing
the formation
the act of movement against the grain
they are being transformed

this is their destiny.
to not stay the same,
but become something different
smoother, flatter, under the current.

how does it feel?
do they run?
do they resist?
how can they?

I believe in miracles.
and more often, a slow steady change.
loving to hate the water, we run
yet the water is our redemption

Monday, May 21, 2012

new creation

the Hand that helps and saves
one falling through the glass
it is the One who also cradles you
outside your awareness

I am grateful for breath
for my body, for dancing
for people, for wisdom
for light

some songwriters wail through words
"leave me, don't leave me, hurt me"
they don't make sense, in the real world
I turn down the volume

the sun rises and falls, every day
it is always there to remind me
life goes on, it will never stop
even after this body dies

my spirit will fly away
my body will be remade
I will do things I never did
and my joy will be wrapped up in my greatest Love's arms

eternity makes no sense to me right now
but then again, a lot of things don't
my mind will be remade
and I will be a new creation

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Great News!

Two pieces of really great news:

  • Casey got a job interview! It's for a CPA firm here in Denver. The interview is tomorrow (Monday), so if you are a praying person, please keep him in your prayers for that opportunity!
  • The shows in Casper with the company went extremely well. I feel I hit a personal best with my stepsister character, and am so grateful for the loud and enthusiastic audience that laughed, clapped, and generally kept up our energy and spirits!
A new stage shot of Peony (Peter Strand) and Doris (me) in Ballet Ariel's Cinderella (photo by David Andrews)

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

"Someday my Prince will come..."

Me as Doris trying to kiss the Prince (Kevin Burke) as Peony the other Stepsister (Peter Strand) looks on (photo: David Andrews)

Ballet Ariel is on the road again! We take off for Casper, Wyoming today to tour with our full length Cinderella. Doris can't wait for another chance to win the Prince's heart. She's pretty sure she can do it this time.

The picture above shows one of my favorite scenes in Cinderella. After the Prince makes his entrance at the Ball, he dances with his guests and the Stepsisters make it their goal to get his attention. He's not paying enough attention to Doris, apparently, so she decides to jump on his back and show him how nice her kisses are. Unfortunately the Prince throws her off and runs.

I can't wait to perform this show again! I'll be reporting back about how it went soon.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Amazing Talent.

We just found out that we are performing excerpts from the famous ballet La Bayadere for Ballet Ariel's fall concert. I did a little research, having not seen much of this ballet, and found this hauntingly beautiful clip from Act 2 on YouTube. Svetlana Zakharova and Robert Bolles are two of the world's most famous and best professional ballet dancers. I don't think I need to explain why, all you need to do is watch this video and you'll see why. This is ballet at it's best, technically and theatrically.

Casey at the Bat

Casey and I at our first apartment here in Colorado, almost four years ago.

An introduction to those who may not know my husband:
Everyone? May I introduce Casey.
Casey? This is everyone.

Instead of jabbering about myself today I thought I'd give some air time to my best friend and "other half." Actually, I take that back. He's not my other half, he's a human being totally on his own and I am as well. But we've been married almost five years now and it's hard to imagine my life without him already. Marriage is funny that way. Each of our personal existences have begun to combine together, kind of like the strawberry and kiwi flavors in Jello salad-- the two flavors melting together in a bowl and left out because the party is still going and no one remembered to put it back in the fridge.

Yes, I just compared our marriage to runny Jello salad.

 Anyway, he's been working hard lately. Anyone that has met Casey knows his brain is constructed differently than mine, specifically, he isn't allergic to finances. In fact, he really likes numbers and accounting. Enough so that he is pursuing a career as a CPA. Since moving here, he's worked a couple different jobs while going to school at University of Colorado (Denver) to reach that goal. He just recently finished his classes (yeeeaaayyyy!). Now onto the CPA exam study courses, resume editing and submitting, and trying on his new three piece interview/work suits for me (what can I say? He looks hot in them).

I am so proud of him. He has such an amazing work ethic, and is such a faithful person in so many ways. He is always there for me no matter how ridiculous, annoying, or immature I am being. He actually probably deserves the "most patient man" award for being married to me for more than two minutes.

He pretty much inspires me and grounds me in a lot of different ways. And thus ends my shameless rant about the best man in the world. I love you Casey!

Sunday, May 13, 2012

An Unusual Mother's Day Tale

(This post contains some possibly upsetting word images. Please be forewarned.)

Today is Mother's Day, and at church they were handing out flowers, as many churches do on this particular holiday. I assumed they were just for the moms (normally they are). Until, that is, a ten year old girl in a stripey dress approached me with a bunch of flowers in her hand. She very deliberately walked  up to me, and handed me one of the flowers.
"Here you go," she said.
"Oh, I'm not a mom," I said, cringing a little inside (because that statement, although I have expressed it in different ways many times, isn't really true).
She looked me straight in the eye and said (as only an outgoing ten year old can), "So? They are for all the adults. Not just moms."
At that moment, I knew that I was receiving a special gift-- from my child and from God.

Wait a minute, I can hear you say. You don't have kids.
To which I must reply: On this particular point, I am going to have to correct you.

You may know this about me already, but if you don't, you're about to. Almost four years ago, about a week after we moved from Portland Oregon to Denver, I had a miscarriage. I didn't know I was pregnant, and we certainly weren't planning on having a child. We moved here so I could take a job dancing professionally with David Taylor Dance Theatre. It was not in the plan, and it was a huge shock. I knew I was pregnant for less than a day before I started miscarrying. My reaction to the news that I was pregnant was less than ecstatic. We had moved to Denver so I could dance professionally, not have a baby. We were not in a financial position (having just moved, and Casey not employed) to have a child. Both of us were quite emotional when we found out.

This went on for about six hours before I started cramping and bleeding that night around 8 pm. A trip to the emergency room, a lot of physical pain, and a few doctors visits later, it was already over. Over almost as soon as it started. I didn't have time to regroup. It  happened so fast and I began treading water emotionally, alternating between that and breaking down. On top of that, I had to continue training physically for my first season with the dance company.

As with all deaths, it came with a lot of shock, pain and confusion. Guilt crept up on me, and I immediately began wondering if my reaction to the pregnancy caused the loss of it, or if the moving process caused it. I have since learned that was probably not the case. It was so early in the pregnancy that most likely it was chromosomal abnormalities and my body knew the baby would never survive. "There was nothing you could do," was something I heard a lot during that time. I slowly began to realize something: I loved this child I never had the chance to know.

I cried. I journaled. I ran away from the issue. I came back, and I cried some more. I choreographed a dance to express my journey with Casey called "that which was lost" and have been able to share it with several different audiences including grief support groups. (What a blessing that has been, to share even just a little bit of healing with others, and at the same time healing my own heart through dance.)

I have not finished processing. I don't think I ever will, although my pain has significantly decreased. But it is not completely gone and it never will be. I have realized one highly important thing through all my processing, however. Today on Mother's Day, and every other day, I do indeed have a child. When people ask me if Casey and I have kids, I pretty much always say, with a smile, "Not yet." I always feel a twinge of guilt, and consider telling them my story (I never really do though, unless the situation is right).

This child, who is deeply loved by Casey and I, is in God's arms right now. The flower I received today was a precious message reminding me that I am a mother, and my child is waiting to greet me when it is my time to fly away.

If you have, or know someone who has ever lost a child, here is a link to wonderful foundation that wants to help:

Friday, May 11, 2012

Doris is back.

Dance is an expandable art.

At Ballet Ariel we are done with our first run of Cinderella. BUT-- soon we will be in Casper, Wyoming to tour this fun production and then, onto the outside ampitheater at the Arvada Center (June 7th in the evening-- I'll be providing more details soon!). A couple days later we will be doing our second tour, which will be in Leadville, Colorado. I love Leadville and am so excited to return to that historic theater (we performed "Avoca: A Tale of Molly Brown" there last summer with the company) but it is much harder to breathe up there. That elevation is crazy.

Peter Strand as Peony, my sister (left) and me as Doris in Ballet Ariel's Cinderella

I thought it would be weird to start rehearsals again for a show we've technically "closed" once. But I jumped right back into it like we'd never ended. I think it is because I love my role as one of the Stepsisters so much. Honestly, I believe I was meant to play a Stepsister. Something about the ridiculous silliness that just fits my personality and theatrical streak.

There have been a lot of changes at work lately. But the solidity of coming back to playing my stepsister character Doris-- her pink glasses, the way she fights with Peony (her sister) over EVERYTHING, her ridiculous way of thinking she's sexy when she's actually awkward-- has been great. That's what I love about theater. You can step into another world, out of one that is not always predictable, and just have fun for a while. What is especially fun is that I can come back to Doris and grow this character, make her more and more detailed and complex ("complex" may be stretching it, as she is a more than slightly slapstick comedy character, but there you go). Character development in dance is my favorite expandable art.

What do you go back to again and again in your life when you are going through changes?

Thursday, May 10, 2012

daylight-- a poem

the silence speaks
the rocks cry out
a tree trunk stands,

the earth never stops turning
the leaves are always stirring
even in the dark of night, without a breeze to help them along
they all return home.

in the daylight, friends appear
offer their prayers, love, peace
offer a God who never sleeps,
who doesn't stop

who loves and sings me to sleep.

(Gina Eslinger 2012)

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

I Danss cuz I happy

Shameless kitteh post! This one I especially love, for obvious reasons.

I dance 'cause I happy too. :)

This girl is me... Ok, fine, it's not.

That woman in orange is me.

Ok, you got me, it's not. I'm not Asian.

They are dancers, however, from San Francisco Ballet (the company I grew up very close to geographically). I love the feel of this photo. Plus, do you SEE the turnout on this woman?

If you don't know what turn out is, ask a ballet dancer. But expect to be thinking, "I don't understand why that's so important." Yeah... Welcome to the world of ballet. I love it, but it's kooky.
Have a wonderful day, friends!

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Confessions of a Deactivated Facebooker: FREE AT LAST!!!

So. I'm really, really, REALLY not seeing anything on Facebook now.

As most of you know, I have been on a deactivating journey for a couple months now. I turned off my personal Facebook page because I felt I was getting too addicted to it.

But, I could still log on and see Casey's friends' pages/posts. I felt like I wanted to take this deactivation to the next level recently. So. Several days ago, I went all out and had him change his password and under no circumstances is he allowed to reveal it to me. Now I am completely disconnected. I see nothing. And I love it!

Weird, right? It should feel awful. Especially because of the withdrawals I had the first few weeks. But it doesn't. I think that the fact I saw very, very VERY little before, helped wean me off of it completely. I can't see anything going on, on anyone's wall. Period. Nothing.

And look... I'm not even wearing a straight jacket.

I'm kind of spinning in happy circles, because a couple months ago, spending time on Facebook was something that was taking over my life. Now, it's not a part of my life at all besides the 30 seconds it takes to post my latest blog on my business/writing page. The fact I've completely "lost" Facebook isn't bothering me anymore.

FREE AT LAST, FREE AT LAST, THANK GOD ALMIGHTY, I'M FREE AT LAST!!! (meaning, I'm feeling free of my addiction).

And that's all I have to say 'bout that.

I'm Letting Someone Else Write My Blog Today: Part Deux

My friend Cliff is a wise guy. Not a "wiseguy," you know, the kind that is always cracking jokes. Oh wait. He's that too.

But, he is also very wise about life. He wrote a blog today that really touched me. Here it is:


Monday, May 7, 2012

Reality Check

My friend's wife, who is only 31, was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. She is writing a blog to keep people updated on her journey through surgeries, chemotherapy, and everything else that comes along with that diagnosis. I recommend you read it-- it is real, honest, and inspiring.

I personally have never been diagnosed with breast cancer. However, I did have a breast cancer scare a few years ago, which led all the way up to an excisional biopsy to remove breast tissue in order to see if there were any cancer cells present. This process (through all the tests, needle biopsies, surgeries, MRI's, etc) dragged on for over a year and was one of the scariest times in my life-- not knowing what was inside my body, whether I was going to be ok or not, whether I had deadly cells inside of me, if I was going to die.

Then, a few years later it got scarier. My mother was diagnosed with a very aggressive form of breast cancer. She went through surgery and is now in remission. But at the time it was a storm of fear, sadness, panic, and despair in my heart. It made me stop dead in my tracks and look at my life and what it really meant. What she really meant to me. What a lot of people really meant to me. Namely, how important they are, and how I had forgotten that precious fact.

Also, I realized how un-precious so many things I had been giving my energy to were. The useless issues, dishes in the sink, the things that annoyed me-- like rush hour traffic-- I suddenly realized how unimportant they all were. The things I wasted so much thought on, and the things that riled me up, all of a sudden faded in the face of life, death, and love. It's people that matter, holding them close to you, forgiveness, and using our short time here to do things that really make a difference before we move on.

Thank you Jessica, for being an inspiration, and in that, reminding me to live for the important things.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

I'm in LOVE!

I know this is going to seem like an ad to some of you... But hang with me for just a second. I do have a point. And my point is THIS: I am in love and I don't care who knows it!

Kindle Fire

In love... With the Kindle. We recently got one for an awesome price. I've read two books in the last two weeks (Mockingjay and Water for Elephants) and have already started a third. I've downloaded several public domain books (i.e.: free) on it as well so my little Kindle shelf is quite full.

Not only am I using it to download books, I can listen to Pandora on it as well, which is awesome because I'm lazy and therefore can't be bothered to turn on and operate two devices at once (my iPod AND the Kindle)-- especially when I'm at Starbucks and have a DRINK and FOOD to handle as well.... Come on.

Ok, so I'm not quite that lazy. Just trying to get a laugh here.

(approximately) Eight year old Gina and her parakeet Misty Blue.

Last point: I have not only fallen in love with the Kindle, but back in love with reading. Something about reading from this cool little device has brought back a bit of the eight year old Gina, who would sit on her bed for hours upon hours (no, I'm not exaggerating this one) and read. And read. And then, after she was done reading, she'd read some more. (Eight year old Gina's favorite books? Trixie Beldon, The Babysitters Club, Choose Your Own Adventure, among others.) Reading transports me to fascinating, magical, and distinctly OTHER places. It benevolently kidnaps me from the everyday. It tickles my brain and entrances my entire being. Now who doesn't want that?

I highly recommend it (either the Kindle or reading, or both) if you get a chance.

Marketing Fail

Came across this on Twitter... Oh the treasures you find! What were they thinking??? Next time I feel like having a 1 year old body shape and wearing a diaper I'll remember to buy a bottle of Evian.

Friday, May 4, 2012



The only questions in my mind are, when? And who will go with me? (I'm doing it regardless).

Who's with me???

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Changes come...

Third post of the day... I guess I'm feeling prolific. And introspective. Introspectively prolific, maybe?

I am struck by the amount of change in my life lately. Changes in schedule, friends, social media, career, pets, and therefore emotions. I am an "F" on the Meyer's Briggs Personality Spectrum, which means "feeler," a person who's moods and choices are more affected by his/her emotions than "thinkers." Thinkers are more rational and look at the facts to make decisions and decide how they are feeling about a situation. Sometimes I wish, deeply, that I was a "thinker." It certainly would make things easier in these periods of change.

I feel as if God has been taking me through a period where he is asking me to simply hang on to his hand and keep going. Every single day of the last couple months have felt as if they were insistent waves lapping up on a shore, every wave changing the grains of sand and the shape of the beach underneath them.

At first I tried to resist them, the waves. But after a while it just got to be too exhausting and I let go. I let go of the false "control" I thought I had over my life and (most of the time) felt myself take God's hand and trust he was going to take care of everything. I already know that surrendering to this does not mean it will be easy, or even easier than before. Most of the time it presents more challenges.

What I do know is that, as I keep walking with my little hand in his big, strong one, I can trust he will stay with me through it all. And that is all I need, even though choosing this path may mean tears and struggle. I have to keep reminding myself of that.

Because without that hand, I am lost.

Don't Miss This Picture.

So, I start back with Ballet Ariel on Saturday for a short stint of rehearsals, tours and shows.

 <~~This is what the pain of being on pointe so much will turn me into. Probably within a couple hours.

A picture speaks a thousand words!


Today I am incredibly grateful. I am grateful for:
  • The use of my body, and that I was fortunate enough to learn how to dance early on.
  • My cat Stella, even though she is extremely moody, and thinks everyone is trying to kill her at any opportunity.
  • My husband, who has stood by me tirelessly.
  • My friends, who never fail to make me laugh and appreciate life.
  • Opera music-- I've been addicted since dancing in La Traviata! It feeds my soul.
  • God, who has stood by me even more tirelessly than Casey and is my perfect companion.
  • Funny videos: