Thursday, February 11, 2010

Terrible, No Good, Horrible, Poopy Day.

Today was a bad day.
It started out normal, with the usual difficulty getting up and making of coffee. Eventually I got in the car and jumped right into my "broadway" songlist on my ipod, which catapulted me into a better-than-normal mood. Chicago and Oklahoma songs always do that to me. I took a ballet class that pushed my technique to the limit in a good way, in the way that I feel I accomplished something and moved forward in my abilities. All good so far.
And then, work happened.
I won't go into details because they don't matter. Let's just say I bought into the lie that my abilities and talents were not good enough, not useful, even worthless. I am not even sure when I started the downhill slide, but all of a sudden I was deep in a pit of sadness, anger, and generalized poopy-ness.
Ever felt like nothing you do matters, that you'll always be at the "bottom"?
You know what I mean.
I continued in the poopy-ness as I left work (angrily). I turned on the stereo and searched for the angriest music I could find (angrily), to match my state of mind. I drove (angrily) down I-25 to a coffee date with a friend (poor friend, right?). It was only after a while talking with my VERY patient and kind friend that my heart began to unwind from its clenched state of anger and disappointment. God was totally working through her kind words and demeaner to massage my heart into a more malleable one, one that would listen to reason. And truth, and grace.
I am so grateful for my friend who reminded me of my worth. I don't have a deep message or memorable lesson to share with you. Just that my life would be so much less beautiful without the friends (more like angels) God puts in my life. Thanks God. I know that you see me differently than the world does, and your opinion of me is truth. Thank you that this is not something anyone can take away.

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